I have refrained in the past in sharing some intimate and personal experiences for fear that it would take away from the essence of what Israel Seen is all about. Rather, I felt it important to keep the information in our personal blogs focused on issues rather than personal musings. But with that said I am going to break this unwritten rule and share an experience I had or rather a dream that has affected me deeply. This dream is what I call an Israel experience. I don’t remember my dreams very often but those that have dominated my attention for the most part have been while living in Israel.
My Dream
The three of us, me, my wife and daughter were somewhere when a shooting spree took place. I found myself separated from them and realized that I had been shot, or killed as I was disengaging from this life (body). It was more of a gradual disappearance. I was still communicating with people and still had some emotional expression left but this too began to quickly fade. What evolved was a blissful freedom. No longer engaged in the physical and emotional ties to this world I felt a freedom and peace never before experienced quite in this way. It was complete. I was no longer able to put my tracks down in this world. I ceased to create any longer. However, I was taking with me my memories of this life. I noticed as I was losing my grip on this life, a song from my youth passed thru my lips. It profoundly warmed me. In fact, at this stage I realized how my memories were my connection to a world that I was leaving and that I could no longer participate in. This was the totality of my life on earth. It was a most liberating experience. I sensed no pain, no suffering, just a liberation. Once I fully realized that I was no longer functioning in a live state, all I wanted to do was to find my wife and daughter and tell them how much I loved them. It was the desire of love to see them one more time before I continued to a place I had no idea about.
It was then I sensed that my personal journey was continuing. Finally, seeing the both of them, as I was all but invisible they acknowledged that they could see me. They had recognized the existence that was left in my ethereal body that was quickly fading. My wife waved to me and as my daughter cried she released me.
After we said our good-byes I began to drift ever so slowly out of this world with a sense of being full. It was not wrenching or unconscious but more like a transitional exit. Freed from all that binds me here: body, emotions, ego, I was particularly surprised at how unfettered I was feeling. Or rather the lack of feeling that heightened me into another state of being. I was transitioning to another place. This experience only made me more intensely aware of how important it is to live the rest of my life as fully conscious as possible.
Everyone then went there way.
Love seems to be the vapor trail between worlds. Loving with all my heart and all my soul is the challenge here on earth. But my family, wife and children, including friends allow me the opportunity to express that fullness in all its glory. I understood how Judaism/ the Jewish experience (religious/spiritual) constantly hints of the Holiness of this world filled with all of his/her/its glory. I had the understanding and experience of this energy on earth. All of this is the result of our actions, words, and feelings. I realize how profound an obligation I have to myself to use them wisely. If not, it all comes back on us as we transition to another existence.
